By Grace...

My name is Grace.

Grace means unmerited favor. Favor that I don't deserve. Even when someone is mad at me, when they call me by my name, they are still saying, "I may be mad, but you are still full of grace!" I'm grateful for my name.

I used to be (and still am to a degree) quite full of myself. Not in a good way. Certainly not worthy of favor. Just by human nature, my main concern in my relationships was usually myself. What's in it for me? We're a selfish society. We want what we want and we want it now. It wasn't until I became a parent that I really understood what sacrifice meant. I can hear Nanay's (my mom's) voice now--"You'll understand one day when you have kids of your own." Yep. Those words couldn't ring any truer.

My parents were selfless when raising us kids. But I only know that in hindsight. The piano lessons, the ballet lessons, the concerts, the pretty Sunday dresses and shoes to match. Every meal--and I do mean EVERY meal three times a day--was on time, hot and homemade. We sat down as a family to eat together, but Nanay always ate last. None of the boxed macaroni and cheese junk either. Nanay said, "I don't do this for me. I do this for you." I find those same words rolling off of my lips to my own kids. It's one thing to have been on the receiving end of that sacrifice as a kid. It's a completely different thing to be on the receiving end of it as an adult with kids of my own.

This new year (while it may be considered not so new anymore), I totally train-wrecked into it. I got sick and got sick bad. I could barely keep myself together long enough to watch the infamous ball drop into 2010. Just prior to that I was laying on my bed watching TV, wondering what the heck J-Lo was wearing. I managed to stagger into the kitchen and grab the cute little port wine glasses (the first time I used them since I got married seven years ago) and the chilled bottle of sparkling apple cider. I remember Faith saying, "can I have some bubbly juice?" and calling my family to say "Happy New Year" and sorry that I wasn't feeling well enough to come over and spend our traditional Dick-Clark's-Rockin'-Eve together. We made it over to my parents' house the next day and the next thing I know, I was there for over a week--sick with a double ear infection and throat infection.

It was bound to happen. I have been burning the candle at both ends for so long, there was nothing left, but a minute piece of wick---and smoke where there used to be a flame. I was forced to be in bed, which is like a prison sentence to the "Martha" that I am. (Luke 10:41)

Why is it that when we stop all of the information overload--no email, no Facebook, no work, no laundry, no nothing--that's when we evaluate our priorities and take notice of what's important in life?

What did I notice? I noticed my family and how incredibly blessed I am by them. My brother and sister were in town for just a couple more days before heading back to their respective homes in other states. While I was laying there groaning and just being plain miserable, they watched and played with my kids, my brother continually brought me a cold washcloth for my forehead and Tylenol, my sister researched for the nearest urgent care and picked up my prescriptions.

Then there's Faith, my sweet girl. She drew me a picture of me being sick and said, "here, Mommy, this is for you so you'll feel better." It was a picture of me in bed with a thermometer in my mouth--and a cold washcloth on my forehead. My rambunctious baby boy, Nicholas, just kept crawling on me and slapping my face with his little hands. (He's such a boy.)

Then there's Nanay and Tatay (mom and dad). They cared for my kids when Dave had to work. They cooked for me (although I couldn't swallow much) and constantly asked if I needed anything--for over an entire week! With no pay, no compensation. They did it sheerly out of love and selflessness.

And my dear husband, who is equally, if not more, over-extended than me, constantly drove back and forth from our house to my parents' house getting clothes and necessities for the children and me.

I would be remiss to not mention that my supervisor and my colleagues carried the load while I was out and allowed me to have peace about not coming into the office so that I could get well.

What did I ever do to deserve this? It was just grace. Unmerited favor.

I've changed over this experience. While the stressors of life are still there, I'm remembering that nothing is worth overlooking the precious relationships that we have with family and friends. It doesn't take much to look at people's actions to see what they carry in their hearts for you. I dare say, the majority of the time, it's undeserved.

I'm grateful for this new year. I'm grateful for my family and my friends. I'm grateful for my renewed health. I'm grateful for grace.